Compassion through Connection
For Franciscan scholar Ilia Delio, compassion stems from knowing
that we belong to one another:
I think our greatest fear is our deepest desire: to love and to be
loved. We long to be for another and to give ourselves nobly to
another, but we fear the cost of love. Deep within we yearn for
wholeness in love, but to become more whole in love we must
accept our weaknesses and transcend our limits of separation in
order to unite in love. We long for oneness of heart, mind and soul,
but we fear the demands of unity. Sometimes I think we choose to
be alone because it is safe. To be comfortable in our isolation is bur
greatest poverty.
Compassion transcends isolation because the choice to be for
another is the rejection of being alone. The compassionate person
recognizes the other as part of oneself in a way that is mystical and
ineffable. It is not a rational caring for another but a deep
identification with the other as brother and sister. [1]
Delio stresses that compassion nourishes our interconnectedness
with each other and the earth:
We must seek to unite-in all aspects of our lives-with one another
and with the creatures of the earth. Such union calls us out of
isolated existences into community. We must slow down, discover
our essential relatedness, be patient and compassionate toward all
living creatures, and realize that it is a shared planet with finite
resources. We are called to see and love in solidarity with all
creation. Only in this way can the earth enjoy justice and peace
which means right, loving relations with the natural world of God's
good creation.
Compassion requires a depth of soul, a connectedness of soul to
earth, an earthiness of person to person, and a flow of love from
heart to heart. [2]
Recognizing our relatedness creates space within us that we
wouldn't otherwise find, and opens a deeper capacity to love:
Compassion is realized when we know ourselves related to one
another, a deep relatedness of our humanity despite our limitations.
It goes beyond the differences that separate us and enters the
shared space of created being. To enter this space is to have space
within ourselves, to welcome into our lives the stranger, the outcast,
and the poor. Love is stronger than death and the heart that no
longer fears death is truly free. Compassion flourishes when we
have nothing to protect and everything to share. It is the gravity of all
living beings that binds together all that is weak and limited into a
single ocean of love.
We have the capacity to heal this earth of its divisions, its wars, its
violence, and its hatreds. This capacity is the love within us to suffer
with another and to love the other without reward. Love that
transcends the ego is love that heals. When we lose ourselves for
the sake of love, we shall find ourselves capable of real love. [3]
References:
[1] Ilia Delio, Compassion: Living in the Spirit of St.
Francis (Cincinnati, OH: St. Anthony Messenger Press, 2011 ), xvi.